Amy White

A Realistic Guide to Managing Fibromyalgia Symptoms

Fibromyalgia is an insidious disease. The constant pain and fatigue are overbearing reminders of your limitations, and learning to live with debilitating pain and fatigue is an isolating, frustrating experience. Finding a good treatment plan can take a while. Meds help, but they never seem to be enough on their own. As we learn to live with this disease and its comorbid conditions, it becomes increasingly clear that in order to have the best quality of life possible, we need a multi-pronged approach to regain some of what we’ve lost to it.

Fibromyalgia, often referred to as fibro, is a chronic disease characterized by widespread pain throughout the body along with fatigue and brain fog. It’s unknown what causes the disease, although there appear to be some genetic, environmental, immunological, factors at play, along with how one experiences other chronic conditions. Unfortunately, there is no cure for it, and treatments revolve around symptom management.

Everyone experiences their symptoms differently. Some are plagued by pain and fatigue while others are able to be a little more active and suffer more with constant, low-grade pain and fatigue. Some may be bed-bound by symptoms while most others are able to get a few things done before they crash. We see the same solutions brought up again and again, but when you’re barely able to move without wanting to cry or curse, how do you do it? How do you keep up the good habits you’re trying to build?

Tracking Symptoms

Tracking my symptoms has been one of the most influential habits to manage my fibromyalgia. As I learn how my mood, sleep, activity, and stress impact me, I can find patterns and make changes to prevent flares. I can see how long they are and what I can do to improve them. This also gives my medical team data on my day to day life instead of the snapshot they get of me when I’m in the office. This leads to better symptom management overall, which improves the number of good days I have.

If you search online for fibro trackers, you will find a myriad of examples, from apps like Manage My Pain to workbooks like physical journals like Fibromyalgia Warrior and bullet journal templates or even downloadable spreadsheets or .pdf files. Which one you use doesn’t matter, so long as it’s one you like. I’m a big fan of making my own because I can tailor it to my unique symptoms. I can zero in on what gives me the most trouble and order it in a way that flows nicely while keeping it short and sweet so that I actually fill it out.

I’ve found that more complex trackers that take several minutes to fill out are tedious and end up being half finished. The Completionist Police aren’t going to stop by and check your work, so it’s not a big deal. I feel anxious and ashamed when I look at half finished work, so I prefer to have something that I am confident I can fill out quickly on my worst days. It means I’ve got less data overall, and depending on where you are in your journey and symptom management struggles, it can be very useful to have half finished but more thorough daily notes on your symptoms.

How often should you track your symptoms?

It’s a good idea to track them daily, although if you can have large swings from the time you wake up to the time you go to bed, multiple times a day can help find patterns that make your pain worse during the day. I track symptoms with my daily journal practice, which helps to center me, give space for my worries, or to simply organize my thoughts and cement my goals for the day.

Exercise

It seems like a fever dream when you’re in the midst of a months-long flare, but the science is pretty clear: exercise improves overall pain and fatigue in those with fibromyalgia. Exercise has many benefits that can help. It boosts our mood to alleviate some symptoms of depression and anxiety, which in our case, leads to pain. As we gain muscle and flexibility, it also improves our overall pain.

But if you’ve been in the middle of a flare that has been going on for months, the thought of walking to the mailbox is miserable. A quick walk around the block sounds about as much fun as walking barefoot on broken glass (although that might be less painful given the current situation). Many of the studies bear this out as well. There is usually a high percentage of participants who have to drop out because they’re in too much pain to continue. Despite this, finding ways to move more throughout my day has helped manage my daily symptoms, even though I still get nasty flares.

Walking is my main exercise. It’s challenging to find that fine line between enough and too much, so it’s best to start off with very modest goals. Low and slow seems to work out best for us, and small wins will help motivate you as you work towards bigger goals, like an overall reduction in pain and hanging out with friends once a month. Forget the “shoulds”, be realistic with your current activity level and set your goals from there. 10,000 steps is usually seen as optimal, but once I’ve achieved that, I’m in such agony I can’t walk without assistance. My daily step goal is 5,000 steps, which is a half-mile walk twice a day with my dogs and the odds and ends of daily life and just on the border of how much I can tolerate without making my pain worse. Whatever your movement goal looks like, set it to something embarrassingly simple. Easy goals help jump start that feeling of accomplishment, making larger goals breeze by. I break down my 5,000 step goal into smaller 1,000 step chunks so that I can celebrate even the smallest win on bad days. If I can barely move but manage to get 1,000 steps, I celebrate. If I’m having a great day and manage to get in 6,000, that’s a big win! This helps to keep me motivated and feel less bad when I don’t hit my daily step count or have to work back up to it after an ugly flare.

Smartwatches make this pretty easy to track, and they’ve been a game-changer for managing symptoms and for movement accountability. If that’s not your vibe, pedometers, whether they be the simple wearable kind or an app on your phone are also useful to help track your daily movement to help you dial in your goals.

Yoga or tai chi is a great option for exercise, as they are generally low-impact and yoga’s stretching helps to loosen up tight muscles without being so intense it leaves you in too much pain to function the next day. On bad flare days, this might just be gently stretching out an achy joint or twelve or even chair yoga for five minutes.

I have also had some success preventing flares with personal trainers, although it can be hard to find a good one who understands chronic illness and the ups and downs that accompany it. Working one-on-one allows for a more tailored experience over going to classes that are designed for the average person. They can also help you dial in to specific goals, whether that is being able to get up off the floor, improving flexibility, cardiovascular health, or weight bearing exercises so that you don’t experience pain when you pick up a milk jug. A personal trainer keeps you accountable and can also help you learn how to stay active while taking it easy so that you don’t lose as much after a flare.

But most importantly, honor your pain. Move on the days you can, rest on the days you can’t. Increase activity slowly after a flare, paying attention to fatigue and pain and use that to guide you as to how much is enough for each day.

Diet

Several studies show that certain diets and weight loss for overweight individuals help overall symptoms of fibromyalgia. This is easier said than done, especially since the diets recommended include lots of whole fruits and vegetables with minimal processed food. This means they will have to be prepared by someone, and whether you’re single and living alone, have no kitchen, or the only one in the household who cooks, it’s not always possible to cook at home.

Meal delivery services that send you a week’s worth of microwavable meals can be a godsend, and most have options that cater to a specific diet, like low FODMAP, Mediterranean, Anti-Inflammatory, Plant Based/Vegetarian, Vegan and Gluten-free. There won’t be as many choices, but heat-and-eat simplicity makes eating healthier easier. The same goes for food in the frozen aisle as well. Choosing pre-made, sensible meals can be difficult, and apps like FIG or even your favorite grocery store app filtered to select foods for specific diets can help make choosing foods you’re able to prepare easier.

In the end, “fed is best” applies to us, too. Some weeks are easier than others. If it means you’re eating whatever’s handy or getting drive-thru, taking care of ourselves is the most important thing. Remember to go back to the diet that works for you once you’re past the worst of it. After a couple of decades of dealing with fibro, I’m familiar enough with my unique symptoms that I can gauge whether or not it’s a good week for cooking, or if I’m going to be a frozen food diva, or even let someone else cook for me. Honoring our bodies by paying attention to our pain and fatigue and adjusting what we can or can’t do is the best way to prevent long flares.

Sleep

One of the insidious parts of fibro is how it affects sleep. Trying to find a comfortable position when everything hurts is nearly impossible and constantly tossing and turning keeps you from getting deep, restful sleep. This leads to more fatigue, brain fog, and then there’s the inevitable pain! It’s a vicious cycle. Unfortunately, like most chronic illnesses, finding the right solution can take some time.

My smartwatch comes in handy here because of its built-in sleep tracker. It’s not 100% accurate, but I can see what my general patterns look like (lots of light sleep and very little deep sleep) and see what can be done to help that. Meds help, but I don’t relish the thought of relying on them long-term. I use them as temporary help when needed.

To help combat my squirrel brain keeping me up all night (thanks, ADHD), I like to use sleep masks to keep my environment pitch black. I’ve found that adjustable ones with velcro in the back are best in terms of being able to adjust to whatever my face will tolerate at the time while still being snug enough to block out most, if not all, light. My favorite sleep mask used to have headphones in them, and I find the large velcro and wide mask keep out most of the light and last for years.

I listen to sleep stories and books read by narrators with a calm, soothing voice with minimal voice acting. These help me fall asleep quickly. I use sleep earbuds so that others aren’t disturbed by my sleep habits, but they are, admittedly, uncomfortable come morning. Smart speakers are wonderful for this, if it doesn’t disturb anyone else. Others like to listen to music, or play a favorite movie in order to fall asleep and stay asleep longer. Some prefer to sleep alone, and it’s a great way to make sure your sleep is uninterrupted by anyone but you. Maybe you need the white noise from a fan or white noise machine to drown out small noises in your environment, or earplugs that diminish all sounds are a better choice for you. Make small changes and see what sticks.

Other sleep hygiene habits like going to bed at around the same time, and avoiding caffeine after a certain time can also help you get better sleep. It’s worthwhile to try different things to see what you like and don’t, in order to get the best sleep you can. It’ll never be perfect, but better sleep leads to less pain and fatigue.

Meditation

I know, it’s a suggestion that makes my right eye twitch. If the answer was as simple as meditation, we’d all be doing it. It’s hard to do and while it may provide some temporary pain relief, it doesn’t last long. I can’t spend my entire day sitting in the lotus position huffing patchouli incense while intoning “om” or some such nonsense. I’ve got bills to pay. But I do meditate, especially when I’m in the middle of a flare.

Mindfulness meditation is a technique where you simply notice your internal and external environment without putting any labels on what you’re experiencing. This helps with chronic pain because it manages the distress that comes along with it. This, in one way or another, is a daily practice of mine to help accept what I cannot change: I have fibro. I notice my overall pain and move on… most of the time. It improved the overall quality of my life because I learned how to stop focusing on my pain and get on with what I needed to. It’s been an important, but difficult life lesson.

Meditating during a flare is a herculean task, and frankly, I’d rather battle a lion. But when I’m overwhelmed with pain, this is still one of my go-tos to help release the anxiety I feel when I’m at my wits end. I like to do this lying down as it’s the most comfortable, and I usually practice before bed so that I can drift off to sleep at any point. There are tons of guided meditations online for free, and I usually hop on Youtube to choose one made for sleep, since its focus is on relaxation instead of noticing what hurts. You don’t have to follow all of it if there is a section you don’t like or can’t do. I don’t like body scan meditations since the pain moves to whatever body part I’m noticing, so I stick to simply observing. No one will know, I promise!

Coming to terms with having an incurable chronic condition and learning how to manage symptoms isn’t easy. It took years before I was able to find techniques that helped me have a better life. It’s not what I imagined, and it’s overwhelming and incredibly sad to think of everything I’ve lost, but it’s mine. We can make the best of what we’ve been handed one day at a time.

How do I find good dog food brands when there is so much conflicting information?

Food is love, especially if you have a labrador retriever! Good nutrition helps our pets live longer, healthier lives, and I want to make sure that my dogs have a long, happy life with me. That means regular vet visits, exercise, and good nutrition.

If you go to your neighborhood big box pet store, you are met with aisles upon aisles of choices, with pictures of wolves, smiling dogs, rustic nature, and healthy, raw ingredients. Do you get the one that has a picture of your dog or a breed-specific formula, or do you opt for the one that looks like it uses all natural ingredients, or that claims to appeal to your dog’s primal instincts? Do you grab cans instead of kibble, or how about the refrigerated or frozen food? Is that better? It’s enough to make you run in and go for the nearest random bag of something that you recognize and hope that there’s no poopsplosions.

But then you go online, and in one nutrition group, they say that raw, home-cooked, or fresh food is best and if you feed kibble or canned, you’re giving your pet cancer. Then another says that grains are poison and you need to feed them a high protein diet, even if the only cardio they get is the happy dance when you get home. On another corner of the internet, they won’t allow discussion of anything unless it passes WSAVA muster.

Going to your vet to ask about nutrition only leads to more questions. They recommend only a few brands, and most people on the internet disagree with their opinions.

It’s enough to make your head spin, and it’s a question I get asked a lot as a dog trainer. My short answer is to feed whatever your dog thrives on that’s within your budget, and this is how I break it down to find what’s right for me and my dogs.

How much effort do I want to put into feeding my dogs?

Some people show love through food, and for those who love the idea of cooking for their dog, it’s a healthy, viable option. I personally don’t recommend raw diets, but for those who decide to go down that route, bacterial contamination is a serious risk and you need to take steps to protect your dog and other household members from food-borne illnesses.

Most pet owners prefer to feed some sort of pre-packaged food. Kibble is king here, and it’s easy to see why. It’s everywhere from dollar stores to boutiques, it’s shelf stable, easy to transport, cost effective, and easy to feed. It’s a fantastic option for those who don’t want to dive deep into canine nutrition, and is my go-to choice for my dogs.

AAFCO and WSAVA: What are they, and how can they help me find quality pre-made food?

Pet food in the US must meet the Association of American Feed Control Officials, or AAFCO standards. This guideline gives a general target for the minimum and maximum percentage of nutrients in a food that is marketed as “complete and balanced” to ensure that what you’re feeding fits within the safe limits for your pup.

If you check your bag of dog food, you will find the AAFCO nutritional adequacy statement somewhere on the bag, either near the ingredients or the feeding guidelines. It will say either “<dog food> has been formulated to meet the nutritional levels established by the AAFCO Dog Food Nutrient profiles for <life stage> of dogs.” or “Animal feeding tests substantiate that <dog food> provides complete and balanced nutrition for <life stage>” Those life stages are growth, gestation/lactation, adult maintenance, or all life stages. Puppy food is usually broken down into food for dogs who will be under 75 lbs as an adult and those over, because the nutritional needs for large and giant breeds are slightly different from smaller dogs.

Food that is not appropriate for daily feeding will say “for intermittent or supplemental feeding only,” which means it can lead to nutritional deficiencies and related illnesses if fed daily for years.

AAFCO guidelines answer the question, what are the minimum levels of protein, fats, and the proper vitamins and minerals that a pet or farm animal needs to survive? They do not test, approve, or certify pet food, but the standards are used here in the US to ensure that pet food meets an animal’s minimum nutritional requirements.

The World Small Animal Veterinary Association, or WSAVA, is a community of vets worldwide with the mission to advance the health and welfare of pets. This expert community set up its own guidelines for pet nutrition, and has a wealth of information on how to read pet food labels and their guide for finding quality dog food and a set of questions to answer in order to find which companies are using science instead of human food trends in their formulas. Like AAFCO, they do not approve, test, or certify any brands.

These questions are

Do they employ a nutritionist with PhD in Animal nutrition, or one with ACVN, or ECVCN certifications who helps to formulate the food?
What’s their quality control, and how much of the manufacturing process do they oversee?
Do they do research into nutrition, and if they do, do they publish anything in peer-reviewed journals?

You can usually find this information on the pet food manufacturer’s website or by emailing them. Companies that follow these guidelines are more likely to have high quality formulas for pets than those that do not meet those standards.

Most pet food brands do not meet WSAVA guidelines. Iams, Eukanuba, Hills Science Diet, Purina, and Royal Canin do. We’re starting to see more companies, like The Farmer’s Dog, are employing qualified nutritionists after the FDA began studying the link between Boutique, Exotic protein, and Grain-free (BEG) diets and Dilated Cardiomyopathy (DCM).

If your favorite brand does not meet WSAVA guidelines, does that mean it’s bad? Not necessarily. While I personally won’t choose a food that isn’t formulated with experts, not all companies have the resources to do research or testing on formulas and instead rely on testing done by other companies. These foods are usually fine and won’t make your vet’s eye twitch when you mention them.

Kibble or canned?

I use canned food as a topper for my kibble once a day because I love to see Kyleth’s little happy tap when she sees the can, but some dogs prefer a canned or moist diet, or must be on a canned diet for health reasons. Canned diets follow the same laws as kibble, so many of these rules still apply, although percentages of moisture, meat, carbohydrate content, and fat are different from the same brand’s kibble. If you like the idea of feeding something that looks and smells more like meaty deliciousness, or if your dog refuses to touch kibble but goes to town on a can of food, there’s nothing wrong with an exclusively canned diet.

Canned food makes an excellent topper for dry food, which is an easy way to spice up your dog’s bowl without monkeying around with the nutrient balance.

What’s in an ingredient list?

“Read the ingredient list” is common advice when it comes to finding good dog food. It’s sound advice, but it’s important to look at other information on the bag as well, such as the calories, fat content, and feeding guidelines. I use the ingredient list to see if the food sets off any of my red flags.

Red flag 1: “Fairy Dust”
Ingredients are listed by weight, from most to least. There’s no indication as to how much of each ingredient is in the food, so it will give you a general idea of what’s in the food, but not the proportion of each ingredient or the total weight of them. The first five ingredients make up the bulk of the food, and anything listed after the vitamins and preservatives are in such small quantities that they provide no meaningful benefit to your dog. They’re fairy dust that makes the food look more enticing to those who read the ingredient list.

Red flag 2: Ingredient splitting
Some companies employ a little trick called ingredient splitting to make an ingredient list look better to consumers. They may want to avoid the word “byproduct” and will list heart, lungs, and liver separately to avoid the term and move grains further down the ingredient list. Others will split up grains, peas, or other legumes so that they fall farther down the list, making the food appear meatier or more enticing to consumers. I won’t buy food that splits ingredients, because it’s a deceptive practice and can make a lower-quality food look better than it actually is. If I see a meat, meat meal, and then organs of an animal listed, or if I see multiple instances of peas or the same carbohydrate, I move on to something else.

AAFCO has a nice breakdown of what certain terms on your food bag mean and is a very valuable resource for understanding what’s in your dog’s food. Terms like “byproduct” and “meal” aren’t warning signs that it’s a low quality food and oftentimes make up the bulk of the meat content in your pet’s food and are packed with necessary vitamins and minerals.

Red Flag 3: Grain Free
Although we think of our dogs as carnivores, they are actually omnivores and have evolved to tolerate grains and use them as a viable source of energy. In fact, grain allergies are relatively rare. Since my dogs don’t have any sort of allergy or intolerance to grains, I keep them on a tested grain-inclusive diet. When I see a bag that lists peas, pea protein, along with other legumes and ancient grains, I put it down. There’s a higher chance of DCM with this food, and there are better, often cheaper, options available.

All that being said, if your dog does have a grain allergy or intolerance and a grain free formula is the only one that they can eat without leaving skid marks on the carpet and vomit in their bed, then by all means, feed what works for your dog. Dogs with food intolerances have a hard time finding a food that agrees with them, so when you find that unicorn, it’s worth every penny. At the end of the day, fed is best.

Nutritional analysis and calories

The Guaranteed Analysis panel on your pet’s food gives you an idea of its protein, fat, fiber, and a few minerals. They don’t list exact amounts, instead they will list either the minimum or maximum levels for a particular macro- or micronutrient. Since my dogs aren’t athletes, I opt for a mid-range protein content, around 20%. My beagle mix gains weight easily, so I don’t go for foods that have over 10% fat. High fat percentages can also lead to gastrointestinal upset or pancreatitis, so if your dog is prone to these or if your vet recommends a lower fat food, check for this panel to see if the food is something worth considering.

Keep in mind that if the bag says that it has 10% minimum fat, it may have more than that, just no less than 10%. This is why my next stop is the calorie content. You’ll usually find this near the recommended feeding amounts or guaranteed analysis. This gives me an idea on how much I can feed my dogs to keep them in an ideal body condition, which is easier said than done with my beagle mix, Izzy, who lives to eat. People with dogs that don’t keep on weight easily or who participate in dog sports may want to opt for a higher calorie food in order to keep their dogs from being underweight. Average dog food tends to fall somewhere between 350-400 calories per 8 oz cup, so I look for something around that amount. High protein food tends to be fattier, and more calorie dense.

What about raw?

While some swear by the health benefits of feeding a dog a raw diet, vets don’t recommend them due to the risk of salmonella and listeria disease. Additionally, most of the diets are meat heavy, which is pretty unbalanced. This gives your dog a higher risk of developing preventable diseases due to malnutrition. For those who want a whole food approach to their dog’s nutrition, cooked diets are safer for everyone, especially if you have children, are immunocompromised, or live with someone who is.

If I am supposed to eat whole foods, why am I feeding my dog a highly processed diet?

If you love to cook and the idea of making your dog’s food makes you happy, cooking for them is a viable option, although there are some things to consider.

Dog nutrition is different from human nutrition. Approaching your dog’s diet in a similar manner to your own can lead to disastrous results, and it’s best to consult with a veterinary nutritionist to help you create recipes that are safe and nutritious. If you don’t have access to a nutritionist in your area, or you’re impatient, balance.it is my favorite resource for healthy recipes for home cooking. They’re vet recommended and use a veterinary nutritionist to formulate their recipes.

Cooking for your dog and sourcing the right ingredients can be time consuming and expensive. While the end result is worth it, it’s not always feasible in this day and age. Fortunately, there are several companies that will send you prepared meals, and you can pick up fresh dog food at specialty pet stores as well as many neighborhood grocery stores. Make sure to read the feeding guidelines for fresh food, since it’s less calorie dense than kibble and you will need to feed more to meet their energy needs. Just make sure that whoever is formulating the food is a qualified nutritionist, regardless of whether or not you find them online or in store.

The good news is that we have many different ways to feed your dog a healthy, nutritious diet for a lifetime of wet noses and wigglebutts. The bad news is that we have many different ways to feed our dogs and it can be overwhelming. If you live in a multi-dog household, you may need different brands or formulas for each dog.

There is no shame in feeding your dog the cheap stuff if that’s what you can afford

There is no shame in spoiling your dog with high quality, expensive food if that’s what you like.

There is no shame in cooking for your dog if that’s your love language.

So long as you are mindful about what and how you feed your dog, you are doing enough.

What’s your favorite way to feed your dog? Leave your food suggestions below!

Choosing the Right Yarn for Crochet Projects

It costs how much per skein?! How to make yarn substitutions for your new project for a happier wallet (and/or spouse)

Turns out, the designer’s suggested yarn and hook actually matters if you’re looking to crochet a wearable item that actually fits. Don’t ask me how I know… it’s still lurking in the UFO pile of shame.

Maybe it’s the ADHD or that I have a limited budget, but I don’t often grab the same yarn that the designer used for their projects. Maybe one day I’ll be able to afford the hand dyed yarn made from angel tears and pampered goats who eat better than I do. Until then, if I’m not picking up a project made from the cheap and cheerful stuff, I need to get creative and use what I have before my yarn stash takes over my living room more than it already does.

When you’re taking a moderately hinged, or in my case, a completely unhinged, deviation from your pattern, it’s good to do a gauge swatch to make sure that you will have the same stitch count. Your finished project won’t look like the designer’s photo. Depending on if you’re using the same or different recommended fiber, your project will have a different drape, feel, and overall look. Your gauge swatch will give you a good idea of what your project will look like, as well as help you dial in your hook size to nail your stitches and/or rows per inch.

Choosing the right substitution

Yarn weight

If you’re wanting a project that is roughly the same size outlined in your pattern, the weight of your yarn is the most important thing to consider. Weight, in this case, refers to the relative thickness of the yarn. The Craft Yarn Council lists eight weights:

0: Lace (sometimes also called Thread)

1: Super Fine (often called Fingering, Sock, or Baby)

2: Fine (often called Sport or Baby)

3: Light (often called DK or Light Worsted)

4: Medium (often called Worsted, Afghan, or Aran)

5: Bulky (often called Chunky, Craft, or Rug)

6: Super Bulky (often called Super Chunky or Roving)

7: Jumbo (often called Arm Knitting Yarn)

This will get you into the ballpark of where you need to be, although there is a bit of wiggle room between the weights. “Baby” can be slightly thick and labeled as a fine (#2) yarn, or it can be very thin and light like a super fine (#1) yarn. If you choose a yarn of a different weight than the pattern suggests, it changes the final size and feel. For example, using a thicker yarn will result in a larger, denser fabric compared to the original design, even if you follow the pattern exactly. I’ve also seen that some yarns listed as a #4 medium weight yarn are nearly identical to a yarn with a Fine (#2) weight. This is where swatching will save you from frogging hours of work.

If you’re digging through the random balls of yarn that have been in your stash since skinny jeans were ubiquitous and the label has long since wandered off, you can get an idea of your yarn’s weight by counting the wraps per inch. Simply grab a ruler and wrap the yarn around for an inch or so snugly but not tightly and count the number of loops. This is more of a rough estimate as to your yarn’s weight, but it’s enough to get an idea as to whether or not it will be appropriate for your project.

Approximate WPI for each weight:

Wraps per inch	Yarn weight
30-40	0- Lace
14-30	1- Super Fine
12-18	2- Fine
11-15	3- Light
9-12	4- Medium
6-9	5- Bulky
5-6	6- Super Bulky
1-4	7- Jumbo

If you want a more precise substitution for your yarn, you can find suggestions on yarnsub.com. Simply enter in what the pattern calls for and it will give you similar yarns in a variety of price points and fibers to find your perfect match.

Once you know the weight of the yarn you need to use for your project, you can then start to look at the fiber of the yarn.

Yarn fibers

There is a big caveat here: the type of fiber you use will make a drastic difference in how the fabric looks and feels. Sometimes this is necessary, especially if you’re allergic to a type of fiber, hate the way a specific fiber feels against your skin, do not wish to use animal products, or just want to treat yourself. Matching the designer’s choice of fiber will keep your finished project looking and behaving more like how the pattern was envisioned.

The three big categories here are animal, plant, and synthetic. Within each of those you will find a variety of fibers to suit your needs and budget.

Animal

Wool is the most common animal fiber for yarn, and it’s thick, warm, and easy to find, even at craft stores. You can find it in a ton of colors, weights, quality, and price.

Cashmere is yarn made from goats, and is soft and luxurious. It’s ideal for lightweight but warm garments like sweaters and cardigans.

Mohair is also made from goats, but due to its fine, fuzzy nature, it’s not great to crochet with by itself and benefits from another, less fussy yarn carried alongside it in a project.

Alpaca is warm and delightfully silky. It’s one of my favorites, even though I live in Texas, where it’s not appropriate for 10 ½ out of 12 months. I usually opt for a fine or super fine weight and an open, lacy pattern.

Silk is expensive but has unparalleled sheen and softness. You’ll usually find this in a blend, where its luxurious sheen and drape can enhance other fibers. It’s a great fiber as it will keep you both warm and cool, depending on the weather and stitch.

Plant

Cotton is the most common plant-based yarn you can find. Unfortunately, the cotton yarn I find in my local craft and big box stores is, frankly, awful. It’s thick, scratchy, and good for nothing but dishcloths, but don’t let that turn you off of cotton! I’m a huge fan of mercerized cotton, which is softer, shinier, and smoother than unmercerized cotton.

Linen is a fantastic yarn for summer projects! It’s lightweight, well-known for its moisture-wicking properties, and doesn’t stretch out like other fibers do. It can, however, be stiff and is notorious for splitting.

Bamboo is relatively new, and despite it being more expensive than cotton, is a fantastic, soft yarn that is great for a variety of projects. You’ll sometimes see this listed as viscose or rayon, which are synthetic techniques for turning cellulose into fiber.

Synthetic

Acrylic is by far the most common synthetic yarn you can find. While it has a bad rap from some yarn snobs, it’s the perfect choice for people new to any fiber art due to its availability and affordability. While there are some low-quality, crunchy acrylic yarns out there (IYKYK), there are also some delightfully soft and high quality brands that are a dream to work with.

Nylon is seldom used on its own, but is often found in blends to help make yarns stronger and more durable.

Rayon/viscose is a soft, silky yarn that is made from regenerated cellulose. It’s also a common blend to help increase softness and luster in yarns.

One of the things I love about crochet is that I can make a garment that’s exactly the right shape and fiber for me, regardless of the pattern’s suggestion. If you love the way a particular pattern looks, you can follow the pattern down to the yarn and hooks. If you embrace the notion of “happy accidents”, use the pattern as a guide instead of a bible. If you want a similar garment, opt for a yarn that has a similar fiber content and size. If you hate the fiber, change it out for something you like more, or that’s more affordable to you!

Even though your finished garment won’t look exactly like the designer’s, it will be a garment as unique as you. There is nothing like wearing a handmade garment out and about so when someone comments on your clothes, you can casually say, “Oh, this? I made it myself.”

Coping With Executive Dysfunction When You’re a Newly-Diagnosed Adult With ADHD

The author shares their journey of recognizing their neurodivergence, specifically ADHD. After struggling with executive dysfunction and mental health issues, they found solace in social media, leading to a diagnosis. They explore various coping strategies, emphasizing the importance of breaking tasks down, colorful organization, and celebrating small wins to thrive amidst challenges.

I’ve always been a little different from my peers. I was by all accounts, an odd duck. I learned to read on my own at four, I can’t sit and watch a tv show without doing something else, and sometimes I’d doodle instead of taking notes but I could still recall the information while looking at the drawing. I was a bright student, but never seemed to harness it into the excellent grades my teachers thought I should have.

I didn’t realize what was going on until social media diagnosed me. It fed me short video after video from neurodivergent creators talking about their experiences with autism and ADHD and I found myself in their lived experiences.

Turns out, getting a diagnosis of Autism or ADHD as an adult is a little like coming out as LGBT. First, you find out what everyone else already knows about you, and then you tell your parents (or doctor). I ended up getting diagnosed with ADHD by a psychiatrist while in the middle of a serious mental health crisis caused by a toxic work environment and the toll of constantly masking for the last 30-some odd years.

It took some getting used to, despite the TikTok/Instagram/YouTube/Facebook algorithm shouting it in my face, but suddenly things made sense. My struggles with getting tasks done, even while I berated myself for being a lazy, unmotivated, terrible human who would never amount to anything, was a symptom of the lifelong executive dysfunction I struggle with.

Executive Dysfunction is a common experience among neurodivergent people, and we struggle with all aspects of getting things done. This is frustrating and leads to a lot of self-doubt and criticism.

What is Executive Dysfunction?

Executive dysfunction can take on many forms, like hyperfocusing on one task and losing track of time, being so overwhelmed with a task that you don’t know where to begin, getting easily distracted during a boring or stressful task, or ignoring an important task in favor of something new and shiny. It shows up in an explosion of chaos on flat surfaces, forgotten bills, and that shiny new planner that will be The One until it inevitably ends up in the planner graveyard like all the others before it. It can be debilitating, impacting your ability to make concrete plans or just simply do the day-to-day tasks that everyone seems to have a handle on except you. It gets tied up in cycles of shame that leave you further paralyzed.

But life doesn’t stop just because we can’t seem to get out of our heads and do the work we need to do. Bosses don’t accept it as an excuse when the task or project isn’t done on time, nor does the electric company take off late fees when you haven’t paid. Friends and family may still be hurt if you don’t respond to their texts or calls, and that doom pile hasn’t cleaned itself. (How rude) It’s hard to know where to begin, and without a solid plan, I stall and end up doing something easier, like amigurumi, leaving the pile to get worse and more overwhelming. Part of living with any chronic condition is learning how to manage symptoms and restructuring your life in a way that makes sense for you.

“This one crazy hack…” hits home, but is it any good?

Social media can be a wealth of information. Creators like Jessica McCabe or Rich and Rox offer tricks and tips to help make life easier. As more adults learn about their own neurodivergence, we’ve seen an explosion of content, and not all of it is good.

Great content creators who talk about their struggles and how they find solutions to their problems can help spark our amazing, creative, neurodivergent brains into high gear and look for creative and innovative solutions. I like actionable instructions, but following strategies as I see them in videos or articles doesn’t always work for me. As the saying goes, “If you’ve met one neurodivergent person, you’ve met one neurodivergent person.” Finding what will work for you is as unique as your own strengths and weaknesses. This is a place to let your creativity shine! There are a few common themes from online creators, and it’s a great place to start when you don’t know where to turn.

Write it down

“I’ll remember later” is a lie I tell myself all the time. I have the working memory of a geriatric goldfish and I keep forgetting that I forget. It’s a vicious cycle. If it’s important, make sure to write it down somewhere where you will see it… on your phone, a sticky note on the bathroom mirror, someplace where it will be there for you. Setting up reminders through your smart speaker can also help keep you on track when you need to get started if you’re the sort to lose notes. I ask my smart speaker to remind me of appointments I have and start times for certain projects to keep me on track. It’s so helpful to have a virtual assistant so I know when it’s time to get something important done. This is especially helpful with my time blindness, which creeps up on me at 4 AM when I realize I should have been in bed a few hours ago.

External cues are a vital coping strategy for people with ADHD. Time blindness sneaks up on us, and without something to take us out of our hyperfocused state, we can easily lose hours to a more engaging but less productive task, leaving us less time to do the things we actually have to get done. Having a reminder on paper, through a smart speaker, or our phones help to remind us of what’s really important.

Break it down

I wish I had the ability to clean without getting paralyzed by the enormity of the task. Do I have gloves, because sticky is a no-no texture that gets me off track because it needs to be fixed now? Where’s the mop, broom, and vacuum? Do I have the right cleaning spray? More importantly, where do I begin? Should I gather all the dishes and put them into the dishwasher or should I declutter the countertops before I think about tackling the dishes? Or should I think about all I need to do and shut down, leaving the mess to loom in the background, silently accusing me of all of my mistakes, including the time I got lost on a field trip in the third grade?

Instead of spiraling into inaction, I like to take big tasks and break them into smaller chunks. If I’m not sure where to begin, websites and apps like Goblin Tools do the work for me. Generative AI can be really useful here, too. Outsourcing the mental load of breaking down goals also helps with the task paralysis of dealing with your task paralysis. It’s an ouroboros of guilt that we don’t have to indulge in.

Breaking things down like this, or chunking, is a widely recognized productivity tool that helps neurodivergent people by breaking down overwhelming chores and projects into easier and smaller tasks. As we mark the little things off, it helps us become more confident in achieving our goals with lots of little wins. This leads to a greater sense of accomplishment, making the next small task seem more achievable. Even if the entire task doesn’t get done, we are closer to the big goal, leaving us with a sense of accomplishment and that oh so important dopamine hit to keep us going. Some like the physical act of scratching off the item on their to-do list, while I personally like the jingle of rainbow coins in a task app. What matters is that you get a small sense of satisfaction or pleasure when you celebrate your small win. It adds up to create a pleasant habit that you keep up with better.

Make it colorful

Many neurodivergent people love color, and using color can remind us of what’s important. Color coding what’s important and then having different colors to show similar steps helps to organize smaller goals into easier, achievable tasks and is a visual reminder of the chunks we want to accomplish that day. A large, overwhelming list in black ink can be paralyzing, but a rainbow explosion of important tasks broken down by color can make it easier to see what’s a priority and what’s not. It’s much easier to look for a specific color to keep from getting lost in a long to-do list.

Some like the simplicity of common systems like red equals an important event or step. If a color is overwhelming or takes you back to school and a paper with a large, circled F on it, bleeding with red ink, don’t use it. Find your unique color system and implement it into your planning. Use colors you love and make it your own. Just remember to make yourself a key so you remember what’s what until it becomes second nature.

Set yourself up for success

One of the first things I learned as a dog trainer is that in order to help your dog learn, you need to set them up for success. This means giving them lots of ways to earn that delicious treat so that making the right decision is easier than making the wrong one. Eventually, the right decision becomes the easy one because of positive associations with it. The more we like the consequences of a particular behavior, the more we do it, which is a cornerstone in the theory of behaviorism.

While this is relatively straightforward in dogs, this is more complex in people when we have more motivations and paths for both reward and punishment to guide our behavior. This means that our solutions are often more complex than putting a lid on the trash can to prevent doggy dumpster diving. Just like scaffolding can help prop up a building in progress or provide workers safe places to work, scaffolding in neurodivergent spaces modifies our environment to suit our individual needs better.

I love how a clean home looks and smells, and the end result is very rewarding. Cleaning itself is something I associate with anxiety and physical pain from fibromyalgia. This conflict for me leads to more indecision because the ultimate end of a clean home seems so far away from the immediate misery of cleaning.

If you want to overcome task paralysis in everyday situations, you need to have an environment that sets you up for effortless organization. Take mental loads off where you can and let your environment guide you to better choices. It’s easier for me to keep my crafting stuff from taking over my entire house when there are cubbies in my living room where I can put my supplies. A trash can beside the couch keeps it from piling up on a side table. A coffee station complete with mugs, creamer, and a coffee machine near your desk is a better option if you get distracted on the way to the kitchen for a new cup. Keeping shoes and socks by the door helps some neurodivergent people and families keep track of whose shoes are where, and more importantly, where they should live. Small changes like this can help keep the mess at bay(ish), which leads to a cleaner home and more motivation to keep it up.

It doesn’t matter how silly or weird it is. If brushing your teeth is hard, borrow a page from KC Davis and keep pre-pasted toothbrushes by the bedside table or in your bag. Set everything up on auto pay. Buy pre-cut fruit and vegetables if that means you’ll actually eat them. Pay the ADHD tax and use paper plates and plasticware if it keeps you from creating new life on your dirty dishes that are stinking up the sink for the last six months. What matters is that the system makes sense to you. Modify your environment to suit your needs to make daily tasks easier to accomplish with less mental effort from you.

Look for wins

People with ADHD are often dopamine deficient, and finding ways to give ourselves small rewards along the way help to keep us motivated and on track. Dopamine and other feel-good chemicals in the brain help to motivate us to repeat behaviors, but our deficient brains are often looking for our next ‘fix’, and folding my laundry ain’t it. Finding ways to make large, difficult, or boring tasks feel good while we’re doing it helps to keep us on track and motivated. Sometimes, it’s as simple as crossing an item off of a written to-do list in your favorite color. For me, it’s the jingle of rainbow stones in my Finch app. Finding ways to celebrate each tiny step towards a large goal or task helps to keep us on track and heading towards our goals.

Positive reinforcement is an impressive tool. Telling myself that I did good by accomplishing a small task is more helpful than telling myself I’m a failure. Kindness is powerful, especially when it’s turned inward. Finding small wins and celebrating them helps me stay focused on what’s important while taking the time to acknowledge what’s hard and recognize what I’ve managed to do. This little mindset change has made a huge difference in my life.

Ask for help

For many, body doubling is a godsend for getting tasks done. Having a trusted friend or family member can help you get through a dreaded task faster and easier than trying to do it alone and getting overwhelmed at the very beginning. For those who can’t or won’t reach out to someone else because of shame, body doubling through videos, livestreams, or apps can help keep you motivated without having to explain your chaos to anyone else. Finding a community of like-minded neurodivergent people can also help make living and thriving with ADHD, Autism, or AuDHD easier and more enjoyable, too. There you will also find tips that have worked for others in the community, which can inspire you, and a crowd of people to cheer you on when you do something that seems impossible, no matter how small it is.

It seems simple, but it makes a big difference. Having someone working alongside you, whether they be in person or online, helps to keep us accountable and focused.

Living with ADHD is hard, but not impossible

Even though getting a diagnosis as an adult has its own set of challenges, it is a relief in many ways. I’m not an unmotivated, lazy monster. I am neurodivergent and I need different strategies in order to succeed. By working within my skill set and setting my environment up in a way to help me achieve my goals, I can find ways to accomplish goals in simple yet meaningful ways so that I can finally tackle the floordrobe that haunts my bedroom. I’m not just coping, but I have the means and methods to make sure I can thrive on my own terms. Neurodivergence is beautiful and a force for so much creativity, and making an environment by changing it to suit my needs, breaking down tasks into smaller pieces, and celebrating the small wins keeps me moving towards a life worth living.

What strategies do you use to help with your executive Dysfunction? Sound off in the comments below.